I realized the other day that I haven't given any updates on our previous prayer requests. We have certainly been feeling your prayers, so here are some praises I can report!
- I originally asked you to pray that the Lord would give M and I a healthy attachment but would prepare my heart and my husband's heart for letting her go. The Lord has completely overcome all of my previous attachment issues with Miss M. I am so in love with this baby girl, which leads me to the other prayer request - Please pray hard that the Lord will prepare my heart for letting M go. I can already tell that this one is going to be much more difficult for me than Zizi.
- I had also asked you to pray that we would have the opportunity to provide a solid baseline for M in these significant first months of her life. I am so thrilled to report that M has achieved all of these great successes in just 2 weeks! She has:
- gotten on a healthy eating and sleeping schedule
- lowered her body weight to a normal level
- learned to smile
- learned to bat her toys
- learned to coo and giggle
- learned to interact with people, and most importantly (I think), learned that lots of people ENJOY interacting with her and will meet her needs when she needs them met
- started to roll side to side
- started to touch my face
- lost most of her cradle cap
- started to enjoy story time!
There are just SO MANY things I watched her learn. It's so fun to see the transformation - sometimes from one nap to another! When Zizi went home. I jokingly said that I would take any child as long as she was exactly like Zizi. God continues to go before me and pave the way, because now I would have to say that I will take any child as long as she is exactly like Zizi or Miss M!
On a more solemn note, we received some potentially discouraging news from M's case worker today that indicates that she might go home as soon as Monday. I have to pack her things and have them at the court house just in case. I was sad when this happened with Zizi, but I had glimmers of hope to cling to when I watched her interact with her family. I don't yet have that with Miss M, and I'm having to just cling to my faith in God's sovereignty. I keep going back to the lyrics of the song I posted a few months ago, "Your Hands." I'm thinking of finding a place in the nursery to post these lyrics, "When my world is shaking, heaven stands." I take such comfort in that. So as not to cling to the words of man but to the Word of the Lord, Psalm 103:19 says, "The Lord has established His throne in Heaven, and His kingdom rules over all." HIS kingdom rules over this earthly kingdom, and our broken court system. Provers 21:1 says, "The king's heart is a stream of water in the hand of the Lord; he turns it wherever He will." If the king's heart is subject to God's sovereignty, then surely the judge who will preside over this case is also under that same dominion. Here are my prayer requests - some new and some repeats:
- that the Lord would provide opportunity for M's mom to rehabilitate before accepting M back into her life
- that the Lord would protect Miss M from physical and emotional damage if she does return to her mom sooner than we would like.
- that the Lord would direct all of the court proceedings on Monday. If there is a reason for M not to return to that house, let it be revealed! If not, let me rest in God's sovereignty and not my own.
- that the Lord would help me to see M's family with His eyes - filled with grace and mercy, with no condemnation - despite any judgment that they might pass on me.
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